The Day Joe Paterno Died

On the day Joe Paterno died, people all over the world came together with family and friends to watch that uniquely American game of football, where wars are fought without bullets, but not without casualties.

They watched with the intensity reserved only for the AFC and NFC championship games. They watched many valiant and courageous men with the physical skills of gods play out the concluding dramas of a long season.

There were winners and losers, great efforts and great mistakes, and in the end, these strongest of the strong were left as they often are weeping and praying for millions to see as the the breaking point of one's physical and emotional limits is tested and transcended--aspects of the human spirit to which we can all relate, even if we never played the game.

But somewhere in the back of every football fan's mind there had to be a thought for the legend that was no more.

You see Joe Paterno was thought to be different--timeless, ageless, more like a throwback to ancient beings--a great patriarch on the level of a founding father or philosopher-type, and someone who could have had almost any thing he ever wanted, but who chose to live rather modestly, supposedly caring only about the integrity and work-ethic by which he lived and inspired others to live.

He just seemed larger than life--a man in his eighties with that strong profile and wavy hair--his image eternally electric and vibrant, like the colors on a crisp fall day in State College Pennsylvania.

Thought to be the opposite in so many ways to the modern, ego-obsessed celebrity, one seeking separation and special treatment, Paterno seemed only to care about the lives he molded and inspired and the legacy he would leave, about how he would be remembered and experienced for ages to come because of the values and leadership skills he had instilled in his players and coaches. Even his surname "Paterno" sounds like "paternal." The father figure we all knew we could always trust never to change and never to stray from doing what was right--someone eternally strong, like a face carved on the side of a mountain.

So how do you react when you find out this kind of father figure was not who you always knew him to be?

When reality shatters the illusion, how do we cope with such information? After a brief media firestorm, we mostly ignore it. But I think of the crushing burden, the soul of the deeds, if you will, done to those vulnerable young boys under Paterno's watch-- true, deeds committed by his associate--but for lack of any action on his part to stop them, deeds  for which Paterno was ultimately responsible.

I think how even the smallest revelation of such acts of cruelty and exploitation must have worked over the years like an oppressive force on his chest and heart, little dark secrets that threatened to undermine all the trust and admiration that took so many years to build--until he literally and figuratively became unable to breathe under the weight of this pain (a cancer burning inside his chest) all in the name of protecting the image and brand that is any major college football program and especially Penn State.

But Paterno wasn't removed from that pain. He shared it in some real way. This is what most people do not understand--we're all so intimately connected to each other we never escape the vibrations of what we create or even what we allow. No one ever gets away with anything. Victim and oppressor are forever linked.

In the end we may never completely know whether Paterno was more betrayed or betrayer? Was his trust in his life-long associate so great that he failed to see what was really going on? Or was he merely a hard-hearted, completely calculating individual who was so arrogant as to think he could never fall from grace, no matter the circumstances? 

Now I can only offer a prayer for those boys who suffered under the abuse and probably struggled mightily to put their lives back together after they were so terribly let down by people they thought they could trust, and also a prayer for Joe Paterno's soul.

Not one of us is immune to or above this cycle of suffering that is so intricately woven into what it means to live on this planet. Is there some greater place of redemption after death? Some aspect of mysteries not yet revealed that allows us to make right the deeds gone wrong?  All we know for sure is that if we're alive, we still possess some ability and some opportunity for redemption and for compassion. We can still love and heal if we put our intentions into that space.







 

The Main Difference Between Congressman Ron Paul and President Barack Obama

Obama's brand of socialism seeks to establish a safe and comfortable national state of mediocrity with acceptable (though increasing) levels of servitude to which Americans have become accustomed, whereas Paul's brand of freedom is a tougher sell, implying the unpredictable and sometimes even dangerous, while simultaneously requiring individual responsibility that has limited appeal to the majority of modern-day Americans. Freedom as an American theme is losing out to the (sadly false) notion of security grounded in governmental institutions providing a workable welfare state. The entrepreneurial spirit (imperfections notwithstanding) that helped make America great and practically unique among nations seems to appeal to a smaller and smaller minority of the population as time passes. If indeed freedom is just too frightening a concept for humans at this time and place in world history, there will be no shortage of ideologies and politicians willing to usurp what little vitality remains. This is merely an observation rather than a condemnation or approval of one viewpoint over the other. Has freedom outlived it's usefulness for our species?

For Caretakers: Herbs for Helping/Healing Elders

For those of you caring for elders, you know how challenging the health issues they face can be. In the last year I have been faced with helping my mother (who is almost 87 years of age) find her way toward healing from a number of health challenges she has recently been facing. In fact I have become her primary caretaker. She had a prolonged hospital stay in 2011, and after she came home, she didn't seem to get much better.

Throughout the past several months, we have negotiated the tricky course of doctor visits and prescriptions for a host of ailments--the entire process of addressing one symptom or manifestation of her illness after another reminds me of pushing a balloon under water because as soon as we think the balloon (or symptom/ ailment) is down, it seems to pop up somewhere else in another form--extraordinarily frustrating for patient and caretaker.

With all the doctors we've visited and tests she's taken, outside of her initial hospital visit for pneumonia, we never really received an accurate or useful diagnosis, and I can not say even what her healing journey will turn out to be, but I have found many green allies to be helpful to both of us through this difficult trek.

Knowing the risks of the many drugs she has been prescribed, I have felt much more confident using herbs to attain similar (or better) outcomes than the drugs, but without the potential for dangerous side effects. Though I can not say for certain what her outcome might have been had we stayed completely on the path of western/scientific medicine using only drugs, I can say that mom's mental clarity and inner vitality remain strong, and I credit that to using herbs rather than drugs.

Just some of the issues we needed to address included: severe body-wide inflammation, manifesting in the form of itching, rapid heart rate, edema, blood clots, anemia, shingles, nervousness and anxiety, general weakness and fatigue, depression, weight loss--just to name a few!

Some herbs that have become invaluable helpers (tinctures made from fresh plant material):

St Johnswort--Hypericum perforatum--made from the fresh, flowering plant tops (Alcohol-based tincture, dosage 50-150 drops, and infused oil, massage topically as needed). Effective at calming the nervous system and also anti-viral. Particularly effective against shingles virus, use both the oil topically to the affected areas and the tincture, orally in a glass of water several times a day. In addition to a gluten free diet, we found this herb to be the healer of severe itching which plagued her for months--the anti-histamines and other medications the doctors provided did very little. St Johnswort calmed the itching, and we still apply it topically to the commonly affected areas like back and shoulders to keep the itching away before bedtime. Allows for a very restful sleep when massaged onto the back at night too.

Wormwood--Artemisia absinthium  (Alcohol-based tincture, dosage 5-15 drops, as needed only). A great friend of the digestive system, helpful for alleviating gas and bloating. A small amount sipped in a glass of water will work miracles for painful gas! Don't use Wormwood for long periods of time.

Osha Root--Ligusticum porteri (Alcohol-based tincure, dosage 5-15 drops, as needed only). For severe allergic condition, for example, itching in this case. Will work as a temporary solution only, reducing histamines for a short period of time. May lose its effectiveness if taken too frequently, best when needed only.

Motherwort--Leonurus cardiaca (Alcohol-based tincture, dosage 10-25 drops, several times a day as preventative/tonic or as needed in acute situations). A great heart tonic, especially effective at slowing a rapid heart rate and improving the rhythm of the heart. Motherwort also relaxes cramps and aids the proverbial heart in times of stress and upset.

Oatstraw--Avena sativa (Infusion, dosage up to one quart a day). A great heart tonic, aids in improving the heart's ability to pump efficiently, thereby reducing edema. Oatstraw is also a nervous system tonic, and we found it effective in calming down her nervous system, especially in the periods of intense itching. Oatstraw combined with St. Johnswort, both the tincture orally and the oil topically, really helped alleviate her terrible itching. Oatstraw also builds muscle and helps to promote a healthy weight.

Red Clover--Trifolium pratense (Infusion, up to one quart a day). Helps thin blood and improve circulation. Anti-carcinogenic as well. Good for people prone to blood clots.

Rosemary--Rosemarinus officinalis (essential oil, 10-15 drops in a small container filled with the medium of choice, see below). Rosemary is useful in toning down arthritic inflammation in her joints, especially knees and hands--for a warming effect dilute several drops in olive oil; for a cooling effect use chilled Aloe Vera gel as the medium. Gently massage into the affected areas. Relief is immediate, but you must use every day.

Additionally, I have found organic grass-fed beef to be quite useful in addressing her anemia and in general building up her strength. We switched to a gluten-free diet a month or so ago when we were getting no relief for her severe, all-over kind of inflammation, manifesting in the form of itching. Combining the gulten-free diet with the herbs (especially St. Johnswort and Oatstraw) has made a huge difference to where the itching is almost non-existent.


Note: Some of the herbs mentioned here can be purchased at: www.redmoonherbs.com.

REALITY

The blue dot is everything we know.

The space surrounding the dot is all there is to know.
.
The blue arrow is the way our perceptions reduce us to focus only the dot while mostly ignoring the space.

Now, to make the analogy work, imagine the blue dot to be infinitely smaller and the space (the unknown or unacknowledged) to be infinitely larger.

Imagine the blue arrow to represent our egos and institutions and all paradigms currently accepted by the human race.

That's reality.


"We favor the visible, the embedded, the personal, the narrated, and the tangible. We scorn the abstract."
--Taleb  (from Fooled By Randomness)

Regarding Crohn's Disease

One of the key points I find in Susun Weed's book Healing Wise is that any and all "disease" manifests uniquely in each individual, not the other way around—as science often sees the individual morphing into the disease! You are not a disease or a diagnosis, but a person who is manifesting this "disease" in a very unique and personal way—no matter the similarities you might share with anyone else who might have Crohn's Disease, your situation is unique to you and what might work for someone else may or may not work for you.

In a sense there are no diseases in Susun Weed's philosophy, only the disease as it manifests uniquely in the individual—this is a fine but important point. Whenever we're addressing something like Crohn's disease, or any chronic condition for that matter, we don’t want to ignore this observation.

Keep in mind the goal of the Scientific tradition is to return you to normal life as you were, but in this case normal life might have contributed to the problem. Let's promote healing that will make you better than you were before!

Let’s address the chronic inflammation associated with Crohn's and the nourishment required to promote healing. We want to add in foods and lifestyle choices that lower inflammation and increase nourishment, allowing our bodies to heal.

After a certain amount of time—hours, days, months and even years, each and every cell in the body is made new again—in essence we can remake our bodies cell by cell over time—we can heal through simple choices and time becomes our ally.

Consider Including:

Raw Diary Products
Few foods are more health promoting than raw diary, milk, cheese, ghee, kefir, yogurt—when from organic and especially raw milk, these foods promote healthy flora in the gut; this healthy bacteria is the building block for intestinal health as well as a strong immune system--bring more of these foods into your diet. I've written a lot about Birchwood Farm Diary—check them out! This is the starting place for healing Crohn's!

Grass Fed Beef
Will help restore your strength and vital energy that has been depleted by the stress of the disease. Loaded with nutrients and healthy fats--only from organic sources--can be found in many stores now a days. If the beef is too hard to digest, try the soups listed below.

Nourishing Soups (Beef Bone or Marrow soup)
See a recent blog I've written on this soup.

Wild Salmon
Stay away from farm-raised, but the wild salmon is a very healing food; contains Omega-3 fatty acids which lower inflammation.

Dandelion Greens
Super healing power for your GI tract! Great with other mixed greens, like spinach, and topped with herbal vinegars and extra virgin olive oil—add cheese and apples, tomatoes, pears, anything really—make a super salad! Just don’t eat salads raw—when you put olive oil on them, they are in a sense "cooking."

Saturated Fat from Organic Sources
A very valuable source of good health—much maligned and overlooked in today's modern culture.

Omega-3 Fatty Acids
They turn off inflammation!

St. John's Wort Tincture
An herb that is anti-inflammatory—can be used liberally! Try to get the tincture made from the fresh flowering tops.

Motherwort Tincture
Stops cramps and spasms.

Wormwood Tincture
A great digestive aid, use sparingly though, has hallucinogenic effects! Great for alleviating gas and bloating, best used after eating, a small dose (5-10 drops) in a glass of water. Instant relief.

Herbal Vinegars
A real super-star of nutrition and healing. Red Moon Herbs sells them or you can make your own—see my blogs.

Sleep
You must have nourishing restorative sleep—that means no light and no technology in the room. Turn everything off, sleep in the dark. Make your bed a sanctuary for healing.

Vitamin D
The sun is good for anything that ails you as vitamin D is very important in healing chronic conditions.

Stinging Nettle, Red Clover and Oatstraw Infusions
Turn off inflammation and promote healing. They are super herbs for anyone wanting to heal Crohn's.

Lowering Stress
Energy Healing with Traditional Chinese Medicine (Acupuncture and Herbs), Yoga, Tai Chi, Reiki, animals gentle yoga (vinyasa). Spending time with animals lowers stress, but really be with them, not talking on the cell phone and barely noticing them.


Consider Avoiding:

All Vegetable Oils
The great bane of modern civilization—avoid them at all costs! Only use extra virgin olive oil.

Gluten
A substance almost no one can digest.

Non-Organic Diary or Meat
Can have a detrimental effect on your health.

Processed or Cured Meat (anything with nitrates/nitrites)
Really bad for your GI tract.

Artificial Sweeteners
Some of the worst stuff on earth.

High Fructose Corn Syrup
Destroys your digestive system.

Soy Products
Bad in general unless fermented like Miso or Tamari.

Processed Foods
They have a lot of the bad stuff on this list.

Raw Foods/Cold Foods
Too tough to digest!

High Carbohydrate Foods
Grains and things made from them are generally not great—if you must have bread, try spelt bread or bread made from sprouted grains.

Alcohol
Creates inflammation in any cell it touches.

Electromagnetic Radiation
Don't put your laptop on your lap—use a speakerphone when talking on the cell, avoid wireless zones, especially where you sleep!

Either of these lists could be much, much longer! These are just some ideas. I'd be happy to take questions or to discuss this further. E-mail me or post comments.

BEEF BONE SOUP

A hearty winter soup designed to build blood and keep the immune system strong!

Ingredients:
a few decent sized Beef Bones (organic/local, grass fed-beef)
some Beef Shin Meet on bones (organic/local, grass-fed beef)
2-3 decent sized Onions
a half bunch of Celery
a few cloves of Garlic (to taste)
spices:
Cilantro
Oregano
Thyme
Sea Salt
2 or 3 small Dried Ginseng roots (organic and aged 5+ years)

In a 2 gallon pot, I fill the pot about 3/4's full of filtered water. Let it come to a boil and add all the above ingredients. Stir occasionally and let it boil vigorously for at least an hour and then leave it on a gentle but noticeable boil for several hours; I will even leave it overnight sometimes, just take care that it isn't boiling too fast or it will evaporate. The soup should get really dark when it is ready. You can see how dark it gets below--that was after about 12 hours.




You can have this alone as a broth or mix it into other soups, especially vegetable soups or bean soups to beef them up! The beef on the shin bones is quite tender and very nice in it's own right. I would eat the beef first and then keep the soup (mostly broth) refrigerated or frozen until you use it.

Enjoy and be well!

ADDITIONAL NOTES:
Many experienced cooks have told me I might want to brown the bones first before adding them to the soup. Put them on a pan in the oven at say 350 degrees for about 45 minutes or so, and then add them to the soup. Additionally, I've been told that adding 1/2 cup of apple cider vinegar to the soup will help extract the minerals from the bones--and to cook the magical brew as long as possible, even for a day or more! I can say the taste with the vinegar added and the bones browned is a little different, slightly more tangy. You may also want to refrigerate the soup so the fat rises to the top and can be skimmed off if desirable. Later you can re-use the bones at least one more time in another soup. Say I make the bone soup and then use the bones again in bean soup, that works very well. After that, give the bones away to a dog!

A Visit to Birchwood Farm Diary

A Visit to Birchwood Farm Diary

On a damp, late October afternoon I stopped for a moment at one of the front paddocks at Birchwood Farm Diary in Newtown, PA, fast becoming one of my favorite places! The damp chill of the day was overshadowed by the rising warmth of the pasture and that wonderful smell of cows in a field. Like steam rising from dung, the aroma of a warm, happy life permeates this place.



Cows have brought such amazing gifts to the human species, we should have more respect for them and let them live as nature intended, eating grass and having space to roam around, like they do at Birchwood Farm Diary.



This particular cow was unconcerned with my observation and perhaps unaware of the happiness I felt at being able to go to a farm that specializes in raw diary products, which despite their incredibly healthy effects, are actually illegal in my home state of New Jersey!



The aroma wafting from that field, a mixture of mud and dung and sweet hay and mist in the last days before the first frost, summer hanging on for a few more precious hours, made me thankful for the cows and thankful to be alive, nothing more and nothing less.

A Very Good Time to Pray and Dream

Now is an especially good time to open ourselves up to dreams and visions and spend some time in being more receptive to information from all kinds of sources. Richard C. Hoagland is saying the comet Elenin is bringing us messages from our ancestors, that it is actually a time capsule of sorts sent from the last time the earth's advanced civilization destroyed itself (or was destroyed) about 11,000 to 13,000 years ago--and that we're again at that precipice--Elenin's presence is facilitating the outpouring of information we need to save ourselves and the planet. We should pay special attention to our dreams in the next few weeks, write them down, share them and act on them.

Hoagland highlighted a few special dates to keep in mind, October 20 and November 11.

Here's his Facebook page for more information. Look, you can think what you want about Hoagland, but at the very least he inspires me to think differently, and I really like that! God Bless him, really!

I do believe this is a special moment in human history--so why not seize this opportunity? The world is awakening, and the best way to do that is to dream!

Yes, this is a very good time to pray, to meditate, and to dream!

Can Trauma Be Passed Down to Generations Unborn?

Leila Levinson is the author of Gated Grief: The Daughter of a GI Concentration Camp Liberator Discovers a Legacy of Trauma. She made a visit to Brookdale Community College on October 3, 2011. Her talk was sponsored by Brookdale's Center for Holocaust, Human Rights and Genocide Education. Levinson discussed the origins of her book Gated Grief and her continued work on finding wholeness for veterans and their children.

Levinson is exploring an important thesis that has seldom been looked at in any depth in research or popular culture.

Specifically, she asks the questions:

Does the trauma veterans experience get passed down to their children?

What is the short-term and long-term impact of war and it's related horrors on the veteran and the veteran's family and community upon returning home?

Her father was Doctor Reuben Levinson. After his death in 1988, she discovered a box full of photographs he took as an Army surgeon while liberating the Nordhausen Concentration Camp; she was previously unaware of her father's experiences at Nordhausen--and of his mental breakdown which occurred shortly after being among the first US troops to liberate that camp. Levinson went on to interview other liberators and extract her thesis (and later her book) from their experiences.

That her father witnessed atrocities and never spoke about the war really shocked her. She learned, in his way of thinking, "silence was protection."

This protection lasts only as long, however, as veterans could keep all they had witnessed and experienced to themselves--a mighty struggle and one that becomes all consuming.

One veteran told her, "I am certain they [the memories] will destroy me" and "I have to struggle every day to stay alive [against the crushing weight of all he had seen]." In this way these and similar individuals are still fighting a war many decades later, protecting their families and communities from the enemy that is their experience, keeping this energy locked within themselves, but the problem with energy is that it minds no physical boundaries. After a certain point, the processes of fighting against one's body and the energetic vibrations trapped within become impossible and self-destructive.

I knew of many veterans who used alcohol and adrenaline as forms of self-medication to keep the resonance of their experiences trapped deep inside, and Levinson spoke of her father's "workaholic" nature. A noted physician with the VA once told me, the problems for combat veterans really arise after they retire when suddenly they have no barriers, such as hard work, between themselves and their experiences--to quote him:

"[regarding therapy, some] will get in a group, and they will accept their wounds, their psychological wounds, and talk about where they are and what they are experiencing, and I think that can be healing as opposed to denial of who they are, what they’ve experienced, how it affected them, because that’s going to come out in some form of behavior--a lot of avoidance--and some will use a lot of alcohol and drugs to avoid, others will just work hard and kill themselves through work, others just can not relate to others, family even, because they’re so busy trying to keep this 'other' what we now call PTSD under control. . . .[all the good programs] try to get people to confront the demons, if you please--confront that part of themselves they’ve formally denied, make peace with it and say, sure, it is part of me."

What one understands as the daughter or son of, in this case, a combat veteran is that something momentous and terrible has happened and it continues to affect us, and even if we're not completely aware of the original trauma, we can still sense the overall impact of this trauma as it influences us in very tangible ways. That mystery can wreck havoc in the psyche of a child having enough trouble finding his or her place in the world and dealing with the normal challenges of growing up, and when you factor in the added layer of the parent's trauma, you've got serious issues that will manifest in a host of psychological and physical illnesses.

I believe the field Levinson is exploring is closely associated with epigenetics. Epigenetics seeks to understand how environment can affect one's DNA as there would certainly be no prior scientific explanation for the effects of PTSD, for example, on the children of the veteran until epigenetics comes along. In this view one can actually understand how the DNA of the child is altered as it is expressed by the experiences of the parents. As the longest war in US history continues to rage, this idea has huge implications.

Seemingly closer to native cultures, shamanism or even Tibetan Buddhism, rather than science, epigentics presents a holographic universe, far from the Newtonian, reductionist world view. These ideas also meld seamlessly with Susun Weed's Wise Woman philosophy of healing as expressed in her book Healing Wise.

Certainly, there is great power and healing potential in Levinson's thesis, and also great responsibility. Particularly relevant to combat veterans but applicable to all of us, we must ask if we are shaping future generations in positive or negative ways with our thoughts and actions?

We must understand that all trauma is shared, and we can go a long way toward wholeness and healing when we start from this premise.

In Gated Grief Levison writes: "Without the chance to mourn their losses, veterans risk becoming stuck in their anger or numbness. They lock deep within themselves the terrifying images so as not to harm the people they love. But the images do not fade. Time only laminates them. . . .What would it mean for veterans if instead of victory parades we collectively acknowledged what the war took from them?" (256)

Indigenous people and those who've studied the legacy of slavery, for example, have long understood what has been referred to as group, historical or inter-generational trauma. I've included some links below to explore further this particular phenomenon.


Levinson's website: Veterans' Children.

A brief look at epigenetics.

The Gift of Diabetes explores inter-generational trauma as it is manifests in the epidemic of diabetes experienced by the First Nations people of Canada.

From the Indian Country Diaries a similar viewpoint, though they focus more on the physical aspects of passing down trauma, the same concept works for those seeking to understand the energetic relationship between the trauma of the parents and community and how their children and future generations are impacted.

Dr. Maria Yellow Horse Brave Heart of Columbia University is on the cutting edge of this inter-generational trauma research. Here's a video of a recent lecture. To view the entire video, just click on each subsequent part as it pops up at the end of each segment.

SUFFERING

A profound sadness envelopes each of us simply due to our existence on this planet--each of us share some part of this suffering; the condition is just what it is to be born and to live and die. The best hope is for the pain to drive us to be more compassionate, to be more mindful of the suffering of our brothers and sisters.

Most of our dysfunction stems from the desire to leave this suffering unacknowledged, the result being a fragmented life, one that takes us farther away from the wholeness and healing we ultimately seek.

September 11, Ten Years Later: From Ground Zero to Comet Trails

The comet Elenin, named after the Russian mathematician and amateur astronomer Leonid Elenin who discovered it on December 10, 2010, is currently passing through our solar system. Elenin will be closest to the sun right around September 10-11, and then travel toward the earth throughout September until late October when Elenin moves away from the earth forever; earth's orbit will take us through the stardust trail left by the comet's wake in November. As if we needed any other markers of the tenth anniversary of 9-11, there will also be a blazing full moon in New York City on September 11, 2011.

Comets have long been associated with paranormal, miraculous or even catastrophic events. The births and deaths of rulers were often foretold with the advent of a comet, but my favorite comet story has to be when Mark Twain used one to announce the date of his death: I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year (1910), and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: "Now here are these two unaccountable freaks; they came in together, they must go out together." He did in fact go out with that comet.

Regarding Elenin, many Internet theories have been put out there featuring the usual doomsday scenarios and conspiracy theories while mainstream scientists say, of course, it's just a little comet, and not a big deal as space stuff goes.

Richard C. Hoagland, alternative thinker, scientist and underground philosopher, has gone on George Noory's popular radio show Coast to Coast AM saying he believes Elenin could be a time capsule or even some type of space-ship sent by our long-departed ancestors just as their world was crumbling under the weight of some natural or unnatural disaster that wiped out most of the human species and all it's very advanced technology many thousands and thousands of years ago.

This thought form that our ancestors once lived in civilization that was much more technologically sophisticated and advanced in every way, and all at once some catastrophe, perhaps even an asteroid, wiped this advanced civilization off the globe (and we had to start over just to get to the point at which we are now) is rather widespread.

Even the Bible contains similar ideas, first with the notion of a Garden of Eden or Paradise from which man and woman were forever expelled, then forced to fight for survival in a harsh world of suffering and pain, and later with the story of a great flood wiping out almost all of the earth's population and animals.

Science will admit something, maybe an asteroid, wiped out the dinosaurs and drastically changed the climate in an instant. There is in fact scientific evidence of dramatic climate change in ancient times. Even the idea of Atlantis, this once great, but now long-lost civilization, goes back at least as far as ancient Greece.

I once knew a legendary shaman who informed me in the "old days" humans had incredible powers, such as telepathy and the ability to move huge objects with their minds--he knew how the pyramids got built! In fact there were similar sites all over the world, places often marked by huge stones where people of all tribes would gather to work healing miracles. Their technology and even their spirituality were so far advanced from where we are now. And again, it has taken us all these thousands of years just to rebuild to this point, a mere shadow of our former glory. Back then the "technology" was actually inside of us, not outside as in all our hi-tech gadgets--we were interconnected to it in ways we can't imagine today.

No one really know what happened, but I suspect the way of life these ancients lived became unsustainable much like our current human activity on the planet.

So here we are about to fall off the proverbial cliff once again.

Hoagland theorizes that just before their demise our ancient relatives left us a time capsule or some other way of sending out information, sacred space-scrolls if you will, in an attempt either to tell us what happened to them, what is going to happen to us, or even to help us prevent it from happening again. We are at the point they were once at--a moment or two before the end. Elenin is that time capsule.




Astronaut William Anders took this picture from space in 1968 during the Apollo 8 mission. Named "Earth Rising" it became one of the most famous and influential photographs ever. So that's how we look from out there. If you look closer though the scene changes dramatically.

At the very least I am willing to see Elenin as a celestial memorial to September 11. Since the comet is showing up right around the tenth anniversary, I can't help but make such connections. You may or may not forgive (better yet accept) the holographic model I embrace, but I look for meaning in everything I see.

Going back ten years now, I'll never forget the funerals I witnessed in New York City during the fall of 2001. I rode the bus on Fifth Avenue past St. Patrick's Cathedral almost every day back then, and there were what seemed like never-ending funerals and memorial services for the fire-fighters and police officers killed the morning of September 11. These rituals went on for months and months. Sometimes more than one in a day. The tragedy was not lost on me. But can you possibly imagine that level of suffering expanded on a global scale, multiplied exponentially? Exported to millions instead of thousands?

Since the deaths of approximately three-thousand Americans on that terrible day, over one million seven-hundred thousand people have been killed or seriously wounded as a result of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. The total cost of the war to the United States at the time of this writing is over 1.2 trillion dollars.

But never mind the plans of the Bush/Cheney administration, a bunch of rejects from the Vietnam Era who were seeking some sort of shadow redemption for the failures of the nation's foreign policy in Vietnam, revisiting a disastrous policy that would now be inflicted again, like a bad Hollywood sequel to a bad film, on the world, I knew we were in trouble one day shortly after the attacks while sitting at a community table at a famous vegetarian restaurant in lower Manhattan and these hippie/vegan types, over their tofu and sprouts, were literally calling for the blood of those who had done this to their city. I was left speechless. Shortly after that I started eating meat again.

After that unsettling dinner I went home to New Jersey to my favorite beach on the Jersey shore. Once there I could still see the dust and smoke clouds from the attacks drifting past the tranquil waters--that trail went on for miles and miles. The air eventually cleared, but the toxic shadow we as a nation fell into has not passed. Do we now seek stardust or ashes?

Like a portal to a chaotic new existence, the destruction of the twin towers has taken our world in a direction no one could have predicted, mostly because of the war that followed. War breeds chaos and a never-ending war never ending chaos. What so many feared would happen during the transition from 1999-2000, actually happened in a different way in 2001.

Even as our economy continually teeters on the brink of disaster, and the climate becomes more unstable, not simply from warming but rather human activity, mainly deforestation and destruction of wetlands, we have done very little to alter our destructive impact on the earth's eco-systems. In fact we've plunged even further into denial of the obvious--the manner in which we humans are living on this planet is not sustainable. But we resist change until the end.

I need to ask how we allowed our government continually to exploit the memory of the victims, the heroic acts of the first responders, the NYPD and NYFD, and all the dedicated and fearless ground zero workers--and later the unwavering commitment and sacrifice of our all-volunteer military--and used these people up like they were nothing more than disposable machinery? And the rulers of our country gave nothing back. They still won't even cover the cancers first responders suffered as a result of their exposure to the toxins at ground zero--that these heroes even have to fight for these benefits is completely absurd. During that time period, immediately following the attacks, we were all completely manipulated by fear and through strong-armed tactics, as the Congress passed restrictive legislation seeking to impose a system of complete control over every aspect of our lives. Now it is common practice to grope six-year-old children and senior citizens in wheelchairs at airports. Like submissive animals on the way to a slaughterhouse, we take our shoes and belts off and submit to these personal intrusions all in the name of security and the war on terror, one the very leaders and civilian planners exploited for their own financial and political gain. All the while we were worried about anthrax in the mail and dirty bombs going off in the subway, the rape of our economy was just getting ramped up. The denizens of wall street that were almost destroyed by the terrorists now decided to destroy the rest of us with their never ending casino finance games, ultimately taking everyone down with the crash of 2008, and ending with the greatest transfer of wealth in human history during the Bush and Obama bailouts--more like an absurd and absolute mockery of all the best values that motivated our founding fathers and mothers to create this nation in the first place!

As we focused our attention on the threat from a small number of terrorists, our own government destroyed what was left of the country from within. All the while the greatest threat to our ultimate security, the destruction of our planet, goes on unchecked and even accelerated.

Since September 11, 2001 there has been more greed, corruption, violence, slavery, exploitation and terror than at any point in human history. War has not honored the memory of the fallen in any good way.

Perhaps the war did make us safer in an immediate way--we did bring the fight to them rather than have them take it here, but is it a lasting, sustainable peace or more Carthaginian in nature? However long we are able to enjoy the fruits of all that blood, the cost we've paid and will be paying for the rest of our lives is dramatic and all encompassing: we are now an intellectually stagnant, completely cynical, economically bankrupt nation where constant political bickering is all we've got left--a nation left rudderless with no vision and no creativity, drained of its vital life force. Worse than all this,we are left without the resources (both financial and psychological) to address the really difficult and important problems we must now face. If the current state of affairs continues,where will be ten years from today?

Maybe Elenin really is a cosmic memorial for the fallen and even a way of accessing information from the ancient ones, information that can lead us toward wholeness. Maybe we can still choose to ascend through comet trails and fly with the souls of our holy ancestors and the departed, experiencing the wonders of the galaxy, rather than remaining trapped in the never-ending cycle of violence and suffering passed down from generation to generation our egos seem to crave so desperately.

I see the flash of the comet trail as the majesty of the spirits of our departed ancestors, visiting us once again, allowing us the grace of another chance to turn things around. Let's not take this grace for granted.




REFERENCES AND LINKS:

Click here to see a memorial to the victims.

To see the financial cost of the war click here.

To see a list of military casualties click here. To see who they were as human beings and not just statistics click here.

Click here for a closer look at the numbers of civilian deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan.

HERBS TO TAKE WITH YOU TO COLLEGE

AN HERBAL FIRST AID KIT FOR THE COLLEGE STUDENT!
A SIMPLE OVERVIEW

Herbal Tinctures
1 dropper full=25 drops
Always take in a small glass of water, not directly under the tongue!


All these herbs are safe and easy to use. They may well come in very handy. I'd know I'd want them with me if I were going away from home.


For Infections:
Echinacea Root
Dose, take 1/2 your body weight in drops, several times a day. Lessen the frequency as the infection symptoms abate but the dose always stays the same, taper down the frequency but don't stop all at once; this can be taken for a day or two after you feel all better to prevent relapse.
Note: Use only when you are sick, not as a preventative.
Can be used with viral infections such as the flu as well.

For viral infections, including the common cold, flu, herpes, stress, aches and pains, esp. nerve pain, seasonal depression:
St. John's Wort (made from fresh flowering tops)
Dose 2-3 (or more) droppers full several times a day as needed.
Useful as a preventative if you think you've been exposed to a virus; this herb can be used with Echinacea and Elecampane during the flu for example.

For lung infections/congestion/breathing difficulties caused by infections:
Elecampane Root
Dose, approximately 25 drops as needed only, not for prevention, stop when you feel relief.

For nervousness, heartache (both literal and figurative), cramps:
Motherwort
Dose, roughly 10-to-25 drops, several times a day as needed.


Where to purchase???
www.redmoonherbs.com
www.blessedherbs.com
www.frontiercoop.com


If you have any questions, please ask me!

STRATEGIES FOR GETTING THE MOST OUT OF A COLLEGE EDUCATION

OR, WHAT THEY DON'T ALWAYS TELL YOU DURING FRESHMAN ORIENTATION BUT WHAT YOU REALLY NEED TO KNOW!

1. Relationships Matter Most: The greatest resource in any college or university is the people. You need to develop relationships, not just with your peers but with your professors. Mentors will not always find you, you need to find them. Nothing is more important for your success, not just in the classroom but later in life. After the first class, go up to your professor and introduce yourself! Any time you can spend with your professors is very valuable; they're your greatest resource. You may need to go out your way though to make this happen; they're not going to seek you out--find people you connect with and spend as much time with them as you can. Counselors and staff people matter tremendously, too, so always treat them well and learn everything you can from them. You need to ask questions to get answers, so don't be shy. If someone helps you out, show your appreciation with a note or a card. A little kindness goes a long way. People will remember you.

2. Consciously Build Your Circle of Friends: Friends are very important in college. You'll learn from them and model their behavior, whether you know it or not. Choose them wisely. It's not a bad idea to spend time with people who are very different than you are; you'll learn more from such friends. Also, spending time with people who are smarter or more talented is a great thing. If you're the smartest person in your circle of friends, you need to widen it. Your academic environment can become challenging and competitive in a a good way if you're often striving to better yourself to keep up with those around you.

3. Don't get Too Obsessed with Your GPA: Never have I seen a more meaningless number that students fixate on as if it were some kind of holy grail. Truth is, after college, it matters very little. No one, especially you, will ever care what your GPA was. If you play it safe to pad or protect your GPA, you're doing yourself a great disservice. You'd be better off challenging yourself and even failing from time to time rather than always taking the easy way out. Sometimes you learn way more from the losses than the victories. You are not merely a consumer who got the best bang for his or her buck by getting a higher GPA than the next person!

4. Go Easy on the Inebriation: Look, almost everyone is going to party to some extent in college, but if you find yourself spending half your time getting wasted and the other half recovering, you're going to be on the fast track to alcoholism rather than a great life. Partying is just not that important. Don't make it such a priority. Trust me on this one. You're spending a lot of time and money on these years, don't you want to remember them?

5. Study Abroad/Internships: Any opportunity you get to study abroad or do internships is time well spent. In fact, any "learning" that takes you out of the classroom is probably a good thing. Service-learning, where you get credit for volunteering or working somewhere is another great option. Again, success is all about relationships and life experience, not just the academic content you study.

6. Don't Declare a Major Right Away: Unless you've known since you were three what you want to do for the rest of your life, it's great to experiment and take different courses you have an interest in. Resist the mental safety-net of declaring a major early on. Most people do not know what they are going to do when they first start college, so don't sweat it--enjoy the freedom. Follow your bliss as they say. Take courses and professors to which you are drawn, even if they're not immediately thought of as "practical" or fitting into your grand plan for the rest of your life.

7. Explore the Local Surroundings: If you're in a new environment, get to know the locals. Don't spend all your time sequestered in the safe environment of your college. There's a whole world out there, or at least a small town, to explore.

8. Always Challenge Yourself/Don't be Afraid to Fail: Again, this means don't get too obsessed with your GPA. Challenge yourself again and again. Take chances. Don't be afraid to fail. Like no other time in your life, these are the years to stretch yourself beyond the limits of what you thought you could do. If you knew the outcome before you started, what would be the fun in that?

9. Be Responsible and Professional: Develop good study/work habits. If you're supposed to be somewhere, show up on-time and be ready to work. Don't make excuses for your shortcomings--professionals get things done without a lot of words. Lead by your example, let your actions do the talking. Turn off your cell phones in class and don't text--be present wherever you're at and not (mentally) a million miles away.


The bottom line is that you must take responsibility for the quality and relevance of your college experience. You have within your means the ability to a great degree to shape your college years. Don't let them just happen, but play a conscious part in cultivating relationships and experiences that develop your character and push you out of your comfort zones so you get the most benefit from all your hard work. If you take my advice to heart, you will look back on those years as wonderful, meaningful, and life changing, as well they should be.

IMPORTANT BOOKS TO SEND OFF WITH YOUR FAVORITE COLLEGE FRESHMAN

I suppose it would be great to believe that college freshman today are truly embarking on a journey toward wisdom and all the richness and benefits of higher education, but so often this just isn't the case. What they mainly get out of all those years of school are lots of hangovers, some (hopefully) not life threatening STD's, and massive debt in the form of student loans. So much of the educational process is really just indoctrination, political correctness and learning how to spit back whatever the particular professor wants to hear. The individual institution and the particular paradigm at hand are all that truly matter: A life changing experience, something truly challenging and forever memorable, not necessarily the case!

Instead of giving a new college frosh a laptop, I'd rather give them the wisdom in the following books. If they understand even parts of what is contained in the following works by the time they graduate, they will be very well served indeed for the rest of their lives.

Nassim N. Taleb
The Black Swan
and
Fooled by Randomness
Not the easiest ideas to grasp, but Taleb is a superb writer. Reading his work is a humbling experience. The man is truly an amazing philosopher but his advice is also so practical and necessary. They're not likely to teach this stuff in college so study it on your own!

Susun S. Weed
Healing Wise
The ultimate book on healing! So much clarity it is difficult to fathom how Weed was able to condense all that wisdom into a few hundred pages. If I had to recommend one book on herbal medicine, and life, this would be it. Susun Weed is an American treasure! The more life you live, the more relevant her words become.

Nora Gedgaudas
Primal Body, Primal Mind
The one book that makes clear how wrong our modern diet has gone and how to remedy the problem. This book could be titled "Everything You've Been Taught About Nutrition is Probably Wrong." Gedgaudas is completely direct and honest, no frills here, just great information! Her work combines the best of traditional wisdom with modern science. Simply an outstanding primer on health and nutrition for someone just starting out in life. Ancient wisdom and cutting-edge science! WARNING: This book may be hazardous to a vegetarian lifestyle and all politically correct diets!

F. Scott Fitzgerald
The Great Gatsby
OK, I'm an English professor. I had to throw in some literature. Still the greatest American novel ever written. The passing decades have not dimmed in any way its beauty or relevance.

Leo Tolstoy
The Death of Ivan Ilyich
Every important life lesson is found in Tolstoy's work. If you understand this book, you get what's really important in life and in death.

SIMPLE RADICAL VIBRANT HEALTH

Simple Yet Radical Steps to Increase Vitality and Longevity!

AVOID FLUORIDE
Avoid all fluoride in toothpastes, dental treatments and especially in your drinking water! It is a toxic chemical, so why do you want it in your body or in your drinking water?

AVOID CHLORINATED WATER
Another toxic chemical put into our water! Especially important is to get a shower filter to remove chlorine from the water vapor created from a steamy shower.


USE A HOME FILTRATION SYSTEM AND AVOID PLASTIC WATER BOTTLES
Get a good home system for your tap and use glass or stainless steel drinking containers, avoid plastic containers of bottled water--the plastic contains chemicals that can easily leech into the water.

SLEEP IN THE DARK
Remove all light and electric appliances from the place where you sleep. Sleeping in darkness promotes melatonin production--melatonin is very important for good health and a strong immune system. If you are not refreshed when you wake, lack of melatonin could be the reason.

AVOID USING SUNSCREEN
The safest and most efficient way to get Vitamin D is through sun exposure. If you use sunscreen, you block the absorption of this vital and cancer preventing nutrient! So get some sun and get your Vitamin D! Stop putting toxic crap on your skin. If you're worried about wrinkles, eat plenty of anti-oxidants, like blueberries (and so many other berries) which coincidentally grow in abundance during the summer (sunshine) months! The body's best protection against too much sun is a tan!

EAT MORE FAT
Get more saturated fat from wild or grass fed animal sources into your diet--especially good are raw diary products like milk and butter! Saturated fat is the perfect fuel for your heart and brain to function optimally. At best, cholesterol is only a marker for an underlying disease process, not something human beings should be worried about lowering or restricting in their diets.

EAT LOCAL PRODUCE IN SEASON
Skip the exotic fruit flown in from all corners of the globe and see what the local roadside stand has to offer in season. Support your local farmers.

EAT MORE WILD FOODS INCLUDING GAME, FISH AND WEEDS!
This blog is all about edible weeds!

AVOID PSYCHIATRISTS THAT PRESCRIBE DRUGS
Avoid all psychiatric medication like the plague. Only go to talk therapists and those who employ non-drug related therapy. Otherwise you are experimenting with your precious brain. The healthy fat in your diet will help you more than any such medication--it is especially important for children to get enough fat in their diets; one of the major causes, I believe, for the exponential increase in mental health issues for kids is the lack of healthy fat in their diets.


NEVER, EVER GET AN HIV TEST
Just stay away from these tests, they are notoriously inaccurate and cause anxiety and loss of control over your own health. The drugs you may be prescribed to kill the virus will most likely kill you instead. Do you know there's never been scientific proof to link the HIV virus and AIDS?

PROMOTE VACCINE CHOICE
In our modern world there are no good reasons for most vaccines--give your kids the greatest gift you can, leave their nervous and immune systems intact! Look, if some people want vaccines, then let them get them, but do not make them mandatory.

STAY AWAY FROM CELL PHONES AND DO NOT SET UP WIRELESS INTERNET IN YOUR HOME
Use a headset with a wire or speakerphone when you talk on the phone, keep the phone away from your body at all times. If they want to put a cell tower in your neighborhood, start a protest movement, and for God's sake keep them away from schools and children.

DO NOT PARK YOUR CAR UNDERNEATH WHERE YOU SLEEP
So many people have garages under their homes or apartments, bad idea!


LIMIT YOUR SO-CALLED PRE-CANCER SCREENINGS
We have a tremendous over-emphasis on cancer screenings in our society. This is not prevention. You can not rely on these screenings to save you if you dismiss all your other responsibility. In many cases, like mammography, they are dangerous and expose your body to cancer-causing radiation. In men, prostate cancer is way too aggressively treated. In most cases it is so slow growing, you'd likely die from something else before the cancer ever killed you.


DON’T WORRY A LICK ABOUT YOUR GENETICS
No gene (wanted or unwanted) can ever be expressed without the proper environment. These screenings and worries are a waste of time. Focus on what you can change--diet, lifestyle, thoughts-- choices.


FOLLOW BEAUTY WHEREVER IT LEADS YOU
No matter how silly or strange, follow what you consider to be beautiful, precious and special and whatever brings a smile to your face and go wherever this pursuit leads you. Don’t think too much, just follow your bliss! Spend more time around children and animals, they know right away what's important.

BREAK ANY OF THE ABOVE RULES IF YOUR INTUITION TELLS YOU SO!

Spring Treasures!

Time for Herbal Vinegars! Some of my favorites below:



Violet (Viola odorata)

For amazing vinegar -- use the leaves and flowers.








Garlic Mustard (Alliaria petiolata)

The roots are what you're seeking for vinegar.








Dandelion (Taraxcum Officinale)

I like using the flowers for vinegar -- you can use the roots, too.








(More)Dandelion (Taraxcum Officinale)








Mugwort/Cronewort (Artemisia vulgaris)

I use the leaves and stems cut up for vinegar.





Some of my keys to using weeds are that they should grow very close to where you live--literally step right outside your door, and the plants you need will be under your feet! All these plants are in my backyard. They just showed up. If you ask them to come or show gratitude to the plants when they do arrive, you will have many more of that plant in the years that follow. I had only a few violet plants in my back yard a few years ago. I started paying attention to them and acknowledging their presence with gratitude and respect, and all of a sudden, I have a whole backyard area full of violet! If you doubt the consciousness of the plants, try this simple exercise, sit with a plant you're fond of and show your appreciation and affection for it--observe closely in the months and years that follow to see how the plant responds! Seem like magic? Maybe it is!

They should grow in abundance and look very healthy. There is no scarcity here. You want to use plants which grow in such abundance that you can never use them up and cutting them back or harvesting them only leads to greater sustainability. You're probably onto something when these plants are called invasive species like Garlic Mustard, or they are the kind of plants home lawn jockeys particularly resent, like dandelions! The idea for me is that if the plant is growing everywhere around you, it is saying, "eat me, friend, I'm here to help you, and you probably really need me!"

The remedies should be very simple and easy and not take very long to make. In this case, herbal vinegars take only a short amount of time to make a good supply. Do this a few times a year and you're all set!

To make vinegar, all you need is apple cider vinegar(pasteurized)and jars, preferably wide mouthed. If you're using metal lids, put some plastic between the lid and and the vinegar. Fill the jar to the very top with the fresh plant material, add vinegar, and cap it. Check every few days at first to see if you've got enough vinegar, and add a little more if needed. Wait six weeks and enjoy! Pretty simple and wonderful stuff.

Leslie Schwartz: Holocaust Memorial Speech

(photo credit: Christian Endt/Süddeutsche Zeitung)


Leslie Schwartz is now in Germany speaking at several Holocaust memorial services, pictured above at Poing with fellow survivors of the "death train" Max Mannheimer and Stephen Nasser (27 April), later at Mühldorf (28 April), and ending at Dachau (29 April to 1 May). Over 30,000 are expected to be gathered at Dachau for the memorial, and the speech I wrote for him is as follows:

"Sixty-six years ago, during the spring and summer of 1945, World War II was ending. The worst conflict in human history was soon to be finished, and few people on the on planet were left untouched by this tragedy. I was only beginning to comprehend the significance of the events I had witnessed and experienced.

In 1945, I was fifteen years old, and except for my nickname, Lazarus, I no longer had a name. I was only a number—a political prisoner—71253. My citizenship in my native Hungary had been taken away, too. I had no papers, no passport. I owned nothing.

As if in a tortuous nightmare, my mother, sisters, and step-father vanished right in front of my eyes one year earlier at Auschwitz.

At least three times I was supposed to die. In fact, by the end of the war, I was barely recognizable as a living person—weighing less than 80 pounds—with an open wound in my face. My jaw had been crushed when on April 27, 1945 I was shot through the neck by a member of the Hitler Youth during the “Massacre at Poing.”

Max Mannheimer, my great friend and fellow survivor, has called my story “the biography of a child that survived Auschwitz and Dachau.” For nearly one year, I had indeed survived concentration camps and death trains. I survived beatings, starvation, and torture. I survived places where most children simply didn’t survive: Auschwitz, Dachau, Rothschwaige, Allach, Mühldorf, Poing, and finally my liberation at Tutzing.

Yet, Max Mannheimer also described me at this time, 66 years ago, as someone “on the edge of humanity” and “insensitive, cold, incapable of anything.” The loneliness, fear, brutality, and constant hunger had indeed threatened to change me into something less than human.

Being here today on this solemn occasion again takes me back to the places of my worst humiliation and loneliness, but at the same time to a lovely and wondrous place in my mind. You see there were three individuals who recognized and sought to heal the wounded child within me.

Amid the most unspeakable acts of cruelty and horror ever committed by the human race, these three Germans looked into my eyes with compassion and love, and their small, yet powerful acts of defiance helped decide my fate—because of their actions, I knew, somehow, I would survive.

Agnes Riesch was a poor farmer's wife with no education. The men in her family were sent to the eastern front, and she became my guardian angel. One day as she was walking through Dachau—back from the bakery—dragging her bike—I stepped out in front of her and asked if she could spare a small piece of bread. She looked at me with horror. I was emaciated, bones protruding from all over my body. I had not seen my own reflection since leaving my hometown in Hungary. I must have looked awful.

Full of disbelief, she said, "Little boy, why are you here?'"

I pointed to my red number.

"Oh, you cannot be a political prisoner!”she said.

She then handed me a large piece of bread, bigger than any slice of bread I had ever seen in a concentration camp. There was a rationing system for everything, and she gave me half her ration of bread, a food coupon, and money so that I could shop at the bakery.

The fact that someone gave me anything was amazing. That someone looked at me with sad and caring eyes simply shook me to the core. It was a simple miracle that forever changed me.

Later at Rothschwaige, near Dachau, I worked at the Karlsfeld train station. There the station gatekeeper, Martin Fuss, noticed me. He saw me sitting alone one day, and approached me. During my time there, he offered me kindness in many forms, including liverwurst sandwiches. We had many conversations about the brutality of the Kapo Christof Knoll. When I was reunited with Fuss in 1972, he broke down and cried when he saw me. He had not forgotten me either!

Before my encounter with the Hitler Youth on April 27 1945, during the “false liberation,” when my fellow prisoners simply walked away from the death train as rumors spread that the war had ended, a woman took me and my fellow survivors into her home. When she saw me outside her farmhouse, she cried and put her hands on my face like a mother. She sat me down at her kitchen table—in a chair—and gave me bread with butter and the most delicious glass of foamy milk I have ever enjoyed. I never learned her name. But she never left my mind. For sixty-five years I thought of her every day. I learned only last year she was Barbara Huber.

Many will always point to the atrocities and evil that took place here, but I will always remember these heroic acts of kindness.

Agnes Riesch first brought me bread in secret and then openly, in the face of the SS Guards!

They told her, “If you keep this up, we’ll put you in here.”

She said to the guards, "I don’t care."

They never touched her.

In the last few years I have followed the lead of Max Mannheimer, and I have begun telling my story to young people in Germany and around the world. My book is now being translated into English after previous versions in Danish and German. I have had documentary films made about my life. Everywhere I go people are eager to hear my story. I cannot express how unimaginable all this would have been to me sixty-six years ago. Yet my very presence here is a testament to my will to survive and to the people who helped me along the way.

I wish now to remember my fellow Hungarian Jews, especially my lifelong friend, Sandor Grosz, an older boy from my home town of Baktalórántháza. Sandor protected me in the camps, and without his friendship, I would not be here today. I also think often of the strength instilled in me as a young child by my stern father, Imre Schwartz. Though crippled by Polio at the age of 16, my father was still the strongest and most amazing man I have ever known. He made me tough, almost as if training me for what was to come.

Perhaps my greatest strength though came from hoping one day to be reunited with my mother, Malvin Kohn, and my sister, Judith. I lost them in the lines at Auschwitz during our arrival, but the dream of seeing them again has never left me.

My greatest fear was always that we would all simply disappear and that no one would ever know what happened to us. Clearly as I stand here today, I know we have not been forgotten. Soon it will be up to the younger generations to keep our memory alive: Do not let us down.

In the past two years, I have experienced so much genuine affection and support from the people of modern Germany that it seems to me that their search for truth and wisdom is also my search for wholeness. My wish now is for the world to know the healing and peace I have found. The missing parts of my soul have been gathered together.

Thank You."



Leslie returns to Dachau for the presentation of the memorial Book for the Dead of the Dachau concentration camp (Photo by Siri Maria, April 2011).




Leslie at Dachau with a letter from Agnes Riesch! (April 2011)




Leslie and Otto Hartl, freelance journalist, at Dachau (April 2011). I think Otto might be the German version of me! He travels with Leslie and chronicles his experiences. If I can't be there with Leslie in Germany, I know Otto Hartl is doing a great job! Thank you, Otto! I hope to meet you someday.



Leslie Schwartz and Max Mannheimer at Dachau (April 2011).

After the War

After The War from Adam Worth on Vimeo.

Matt Craw was a student of mine at Brookdale Community College in Lincroft, New Jersey; he is now continuing his education at Rider University. We collaborated on his book The Song Each Bullet Sings: The Story of Operation Iraqi Freedom Through the Eyes of One Marine for several years. I'm incredibly proud of how hard he worked to get his voice clear and strong. His book is an amazing account of day to day life in the Marines and in combat. I also believe Matt's writing has been an integral part in his healing process.

When my father, Michael J. Bonagura, came back from WW II, he wanted to write as well, but he was never able to get more than a couple pages done. After taking a summer creative writing course with me, Matt signed up to do an independent study project that would become his book. The date stamped on the contract was August 23, my father's birthday. I felt even then Matt's project was going to be something really important.

In the years since his death, I often wondered how my father's life would have been different had he been able to integrate and explore his combat experiences through artistic endeavors. Right after the war, he was an actor, even working on Broadway with Paul Muni in Inherit the Wind, but my dad wasn't able to stick with it. I believe his PTSD played a role in all his decisions, and he was never too fond of risk.

Since there is an inherent risk in anything artistic, and having a family to support, my father's acting career wasn't very long lived. He eventually left acting for a teaching career, but I always felt there were times when he regretted that decision.

Interestingly, in 1976 when my father retired from public education, the first thing he did was head out to Southern California to rekindle his old acting contacts, which, by then, decades later, were no longer around. At the time that seemed like a strange thing to do, but it showed me how much he still wanted to act.

In Matt's case, I was very blessed to have the opportunity to work with him. He's an amazing human being, and he's going to write many more books!




Matt and I at a recent event "The Combat Veteran as Artist" at Brookdale Community College, February 22, 2011. Matt was on a panel with Charles H. Johnson (2011 New Jersey Poets Prize Winner and Vietnam Veteran) exploring and addressing the many ways writing can help heal combat veterans.




Matt reading from his book featured recently in The Asbury Park Press.

Leslie Schwartz Interview with Harold Hudson Channer

Courtesy of Conversations with Channer

Leslie Schwartz Videos

Recorded at the Hungarian Club in New York City on March 18,2011.

I AM A WEED

I am a weed. I show up just about anywhere, but I'm not often welcome.

You poison me, nuke me, pull me, cut me. Mostly, you just consider me, somehow, inferior, or just wrong. I'm just too common. No exquisite breeding here. My grandparents were orphans. Even my voice is common, not exclusive and worthy like yours.

You are welcome at all the finest tables; I'm always an interloper. Your talents are refined and shaped by the best minds and rightly given their proper and due respect by your peers, the only people who know anything at all about what's really worth appreciating anyway! Problem is you all seem to think alike. What I say doesn't matter because, as you remind me again and again, there are voices that matter and those that do not. Most of the time you just ignore me.

But here's the thing. I'm not going away. I'll keep coming back, again and again. I have resiliency and flexibility. Give me so much as a crack in the sidewalk, and I'll sprout up. While you need the constant boost of accolades and credits and degrees, I don't. I know who I am. Do you?

I'm strong, and tough, too. Try and pull me out out of that spot on the sidewalk with the broken cement, and my roots, though barely visible, will stick firmly in the ground. You'll sweat a lot trying to get rid of me. I just chill, knowing even if you do pull me out, I'll grow right back.

I am the earth. I am the energy of the universe drawn down into that little green shoot. I can burst on the scene with the smallest trickle of water. I float chaotically on the wind and reside where I please. I thrive in droughts while flowers wilt.

You know, you might learn from me. I can help you see the parts of yourself you'd rather not see. I can show you that even the darkest, dirtiest corners, neglected in the backrooms of the mansions of your soul are still worthwhile, still useful somehow -- there might even be treasures there in the shadows. This is not the soul you show to the world though, the one your ego basks in like a reptile on a rock in the sun. This is your shadow soul. The dark matter. The one that I remind you of -- you know, the reason you want me kept down or eradicated -- the reason you want anyone who does not think just as you think to disappear. That dark soul is beautiful too and might just contain something you need, might just save you from the prison of your mind and your prestige. It's hard having always to be the best and associate with the best and think only what the best think. That's a heavy burden because deep down you know you're a fraud. It's OK because we all are.

That's the beauty of life. Our imperfections make us perfect, our flaws are our greatest strengths. The broken parts heal the strongest. I can heal you if you really see me. Look into my center, and I'll reflect back only wholeness and love: the love that is all around us and completely free, available to anyone and everyone, even you. And you don't have to do anything to earn this love. It doesn't matter whether you're worthy or not because none of us are and all of us are. That was your only error in judgment -- you thought you needed to earn love.

I actually love the dirt in you. I love the low and common parts of you, the poverty of spirit you seek to ignore. That's what unites us. I love the mean parts of you that hide behind your feigned arrogance, really insecurity, fearing what might happen if anyone saw these hidden, shameful fragments you say don't shame you, as you simultaneously live your entire life running from them, hiding in the safety of your high opinion of yourself.

I've seen your nakedness, and I was never repulsed by the wounds you protect. That's what attracted me to you in the first place. Together we can heal each other if only you'll let me.

First Signs of Spring!

Stinging Nettle,
my backyard,
March 2011







The great, deep green harbinger of spring for me is Stinging Nettle. This plant is a signal that, yes indeed, we have made it through another winter, and now the spring delights are not far away. Especially wonderful is Stinging Nettle soup. As soon as the plant grows between, say, one to two feet, usually by late April around these parts, I will harvest and make soup. Don't worry, Nettle grows back very fast!

I was given a few little Stinging Nettle plants by the mother of one of my Brookdale College students a few years ago, and they have grown and grown. She heard I was talking about Nettle and Susun Weed in my research writing class and just gave me the plants on a whim. I have never even met her personally, but I have to say her gift is one of the best presents I have ever received in my entire life! Another student once gave me Nettle seeds, but they never grew a lick.

One time a rogue landscaper cut down all my Nettle, I mean right down to the ground! Nothing left but dirt and a few wisps of cut green leaves scattered about the hedges under which the Nettle lived. I cried when I arrived home, but my tears were unnecessary. The Stinging Nettle grew back in a few weeks! Now, it is stronger than ever and always spreading out, from roots under the ground, more and more each year.

You are lucky if you have a large amount growing nearby; then you can harvest and dry for Nettle infusions. I have just enough for soup a few times a year, and the nourishing properties of that soup are rather amazing. Of course, I also simply enjoy having the plant growing near my house. It is nice just to go out and sit with the Nettle and let it sting me once in a while! I'm not a masochist; the stings help keep allergies away! The process teaches my immune system not to react too strongly to common irritants.

My body is so used to it by now that any redness or irritation from the Nettle stings go away in a short amount of time. If you are going to try this, start with a small area of your body first, an area where some itching and discomfort won't be a huge problem as you get used to it, and gradually sting yourself by brushing lightly against the Nettle leaves; then note your body's response. Just keep it away from your face, wash your hands with mild soap afterwards, and don't touch your eyes! I learned that by experience!

As far as I understand it, regular stings teach your body not to release too much histamine thereby lessening your allergic response to whatever is igniting your immune system. Try it sometime! I couldn't cut our grass on a dry day years ago without my throat darn near closing up by the end of the bi-weekly ordeal; now I seldom if ever have a problem with grass, dust, pollen, etc. If I am concerned, I'll let the Nettle sting me before cutting the grass, and no worries.